Some thoughts about the mothering article.

While standing in the check out line at Whole Foods I picked up a copy of Mothering to pass the time.


I purchased the magazine on the spot when I noticed that they had an article about stillbirth. For those of you who don't know, Mothering is a magazine devoted to natural living, all natural home birth and attachment parenting... etc... etc.


I was pro home birth from the start. The more I educated myself about birth and the difference between treatment of the mother during a home versus hospital birth the more I believed that the 'natural' way people were right.


And they are... kind of....


It's true that midwives were virtually wiped out of existence by the new and up and coming doctors in Europe and then America. All the knowledge of birth passed down from generation to generation, woman to woman between the midwives was eventually lost. The new doctors scoffed at the idea of an uneducated woman knowing more about birth than they did.

Our birth model today is built on what these early doctors had 'discovered'. They treated the birthing women as helpless and unable to understand and control or help the situation. They developed instruments that were intended to 'assist' the birthing process... They were invented by individual doctors, patented and then sold... most (if not all of the devices) were completely unnecessary.


Now, in the 21st century we are finally turning a corner and accepting that birth is natural and that women need to be informed and empowered. We are also told that the modern day tools (used by doctors) are just as harmful and evil as the ones 300 years prior.

Too many ultrasounds can hurt the baby, Dopplers are not effective, amnios are wrong too much of the time and glucose testing is cruel and useless...


And they are.... Kind of....


The majority of women in America can choose two types of births. Home (and all that it entails) or hospital (ditto). There is a small fraction of ladies who have other options available to them. Birth centers, midwives who deliver at hospitals...etc... These are wonderful things, and I am grateful that they exists and I look forward to the day when all L&Ds have birth tubs, birth balls doulas and midwives... right now that is not the case ... so I write this post to the rest of us.


There is balance that needs to be struck regarding birth. Because it is true that changing positions during labor, walking, eating, sitting in a bath/shower can help ... but sometimes it won't. And telling a woman that if they had only had a doula or midwife or done XYZ they could have spared themselves a c-section is not only false... but mean too. Sometimes heads are too big, or shoulders get stuck. Sometimes cords are in the wrong place. Sometimes placentas detach.

I had high hopes for the Mothering article. I was hoping the writer would touch upon a lesson she learned from losing her daughter. That technology has a place and can be used along side with natural birthing techniques. I wanted the writer to convey her feelings and opinions regarding natural birth and hospitalized birth. Was she angry with herself? With the system? Did she feel like it failed her? Did she harbor resentment to her midwife? Did she blame her?

And what about the second baby? Did she stick with the all natural approach or did she have a doctor the second time around. I felt like a huge opportunity was missed with this article. An opportunity to show the pros and cons of each side.

To me the piece almost glamorized stillbirth as this wonderful natural occurrence that lead this particular mother to a higher understanding of herself and the world. There is no mention of pain or fear. No mention of the all consuming anger that takes over, or dealing with death that occurs inside you - physically and emotionally. Those are all part of the story too. That is where the lesson is learned... after the betrayal.

The only way women will be able to reclaim the birth process is through information and education... which I feel this particular piece lacked.